West Philadelphia native Kevin Carr had dreams of success like anyone else.
Now author of “If All Men are Dogs Then Women You Hold the Leash: How Far We Go Depends on You,” Carr is an advocate for anyone to follow their dreams.
Growing up, Carr experienced negativity and pessimistic attitudes of young African-American men excelling.
A graduate of Northeast High School, Carr, 30, always wanted to play football until 10th grade, when he discovered his love for music. He joined a music group and attended Philadelphia University for two years. He left school to focus on his music career until returning to Strayer University in 2007.
Starting out as an intern four years ago, Carr currently works in promotions at Radio One, an urban-oriented multi-media company targeting African-Americans. He also owns a recording studio in West Philadelphia, Concrete Music Studio.
“I built relationships, I knew I always wanted to stay in the music industry,” he said.
It wasn’t until a car ride to take his cousin to be induced in labor, that Carr became inspired to write a book. On his way to the hospital, Carr questioned where the missing father of his cousin’s soon-to-be-born baby was.
When his cousin revealed to him the issues in their relationship, he was inspired to write “If All Men are Dogs Then Women You Hold the Leash: How Far We Go Depends on You.”
His book is focused on how women view their intimate relationships and how they perceive themselves. One of Carr’s main points in the book is that everyone in a relationship is responsible for their own lives and happiness.
“We are here for a reason and a purpose,” he said.
Carr’s book is a guide for both men and women to gain perspective on their intimate relationships.
Setting and sticking to standards is one example of what Carr thinks is important to maintain in a relationship. This is especially addressed in his fourth chapter “Stop Letting the Dog Walk You,” where he stressed for women to go after their “ideal” and to not settle for anything less.
Seeking fulfillment solely from a significant other, rather than finding it within oneself, can be troublesome, according to Carr. He also believes the media’s depictions of women can have a negative affect on relationships.
“We turn on our TV and see reality shows which aren’t the best depictions of women,” he said. “You don’t see the ‘Runs House’ on TV — that was a show that really depicted a Black family—because we don’t see it and it’s not placed in our forefront, we think that it’s normal.”
Carr feels his success is due to hard work and the support from people who had his best interest at heart. He believes it is important to work hard for what you want.
“Anyone interested in doing anything is good,” he said. “If you’re going to start, don’t stop — it’s a process.”